You haunt me in my sleep.
Through daylight hours, too.
There's never a chance of peace.
As time goes on-
You'd think the pain would fade.
I thought I had conquered it.
That's a lie.
It's still there.
Compartmentalized, really.
In a box.
And neatly tucked away.
Everyone I pick has some quality of you.
But they never quite live up
To the dream that can't
That won't
Come true.
I accept your choice.
I hide my thoughts.
I bite my tongue.
My smile is fake.
But when is enough enough?
What about my happiness?
When do I get a say?
Maybe I said it already...
Not in words we knew.
That box of pain beats loud and clear
Demanding to be felt.
Wishing you were near.
Near.
Here.
Close enough to see.
To grab and not let go.
To say the words
"I love you"
Because I need you
To know.
But when is enough enough?
This unrequited shit!
I can't hold it together anymore.
I'm really not OK.
Your eyes.
Your hands.
A remembered whisper in my ear.
Enough!
Is it enough?
It will have to be.